In a recent blog post, I mentioned one of my last shifts at Disney's Hollywood Studios, and referred to it as 'the poop shift', but did not elaborate. I've decided to elaborate.... Continue Reading →
The Poop Shift (Alternate Title: Craptain)
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It's a Trap (Part II)
Flicker the Fantastical Fearless Flamethrower (a fairy) and Elanor, cleric of the storm god Talos (an elf) naturally needed less sleep every night than their more human counterparts. Whenever their adventuring party stopped to rest, therefore, Flicker and Elanor usually each took a turn keeping watch for half the night while the wizard Chen-Lo and... Continue Reading →
Zippy's Trunk: An Inventory
I may or may not have mentioned before that, in 2007, I had to emergency-purchase a car because my existing car, a Dodge Stratus, um, caught fire. I replaced that dodgy Dodge with Zippy, a little one-year-old Hyundai Elantra who, despite having spent his existence to that point as a rental car in Central Florida,... Continue Reading →
The Mad TP-er
Given the current state of...well, everything, I'd like to begin by emphasizing that the events described here took place in 1995, during which time the current, ongoing toilet paper shortage was not even a thought in anyone's mind, and any toilet paper stockpiled 26 years ago would probably not inspire any butt-wiping confidence in the... Continue Reading →
Roll Them Bones
Yesterday, I received this ad in my email, and this story just kind of wrote itself. Continue Reading →
It's true. All of it.
Did you ever hear a good piece of gossip and then realize that it's actually about you? Has your legend ever grown so large that you don't even recognize it any more? Mine has. Let me tell you a tale... Back in 2003, on my Disney College Program, I was trained against my will to... Continue Reading →
The Weirdest Thing in the Neighborhood
My neighborhood--as I have indicated in many, many previous blog posts--is weird. But forget all the lawn panties, the stoned joggers, the barbershops that are frequently under new management, the contantly-watching-me apartment dwellers, and the many, many questionable decisions regarding yard decor: my neighborhood has now officially gained its weirdest thing yet. By which I... Continue Reading →
So, let me tell you about yesterday…
When I moved into this house, as a renter, it did not surprise me to find a cheap fiberglass whirlpool that had been DIY'ed into place by the landlord. He hadn't bothered to ensure that the flooring was even when he'd installed it, so the bottom of the tub had cracked as a result. (This... Continue Reading →
Why I'm Not a Scientist
Before I made the questionable decision to get a BA in English and then spend my 20s dressing up like furniture and mincing about for a living, I always kind of thought I wanted to be a zoologist. I was SERIOUS about this. I used to get the National Wildlife Foundation magazine as a kid,... Continue Reading →
George
I don't know if this is common knowledge or not, but Walt Disney World is reportedly SUPER haunted. It kind of makes sense that, in a place where people have been feeling big feelings for nearly 50 years--where engagements, honeymoons, and anniversaries have been celebrated, where life-threateningly ill children and their families get a moment's... Continue Reading →
Laura Writes 